Dear New Lady:
you do not need to talk to me E V E R Y time you walk through my office
you do not need to announce every time you go outside for a cigarette - especially since I have asked you not too. thereby you do not need to say "I am going outside and not telling you why" or any other variation of the same thing
you do not need to ask me what is so funny when i laugh. 9 times out of 10 i will not tell you since more then likely it is personal.
you do not need to sit in my office and wait for me to leave so we can leave at the same time. which phases into the fact that you do not need to sit and watch me work while you are waiting to leave for the day. if you are done, please leave.
you do not need to tell fearless leader to thank me. after a certain point it seems less authentic.
you especially do not need to read emails from fearless leader directed to me - even if it is to check and see if it was directed to you as well.
for your age you shouldn't be so concerned about being popular. yes we are a small office and for the most part we all get along, but we do not have to be outside of work buddies.
stop seeking my approval.
stop trying so hard.
stop looking for a pat on the back when you have done something.
and for the last time...... I AM NOT BUYING YOU A DAMN PEN WITH A DAMN FLAG. STOP ASKING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT'S ANNOYING!
Thank you and have a nice day!