Saturday, January 15, 2011

On hold

I wrote this November 11, 2010 and never posted. I am  going to just put it out there now as is. 

Since my father passed, things have changed... obviously. But for me, I have felt like a priority shift. I am more aware that my life is not what I want it to be and that I am not where I want to be. I am more aware that life is precious and that we don't have a lot of time and that it can be over in a moment's notice. I have stopped the fierce house hunting, mainly because most of the houses in my price range are not local...and I can't move away right now. People always say that you should live each day like it's your last, well how would you do that? You have to work, you need money, so that comment is a bit broad and crazy. 

Life has just seemed to be placed on hold in some regards. You start living day to day and just trying to make it through one day at a time... I know at some point I will be able to move on and accept his death and that it is a part of life, but for now, I want to freeze time and remember every moment, every instance with my family and loved ones. They could be gone tomorrow and I want to make sure that I have lasting memories of them and them of me. 

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